A hope note
Never underestimate the power of a dated emotion.
In Pennsylvania, Charles Carl Roberts IV lined 10 little Amish girls against the blackboard and began to execute them. Why?
Explanations range from guilt over child abuse he committed years earlier to grief over his own daughter who died years ago to anger at God for many years.
Early in my hospital chaplaincy career, a woman in her 80s imprinted on my mind the power of a dated emotion. In the course of our conversation, she made a cryptic reference to something painful that had happened to her when she was young. When I gently probed, a gusher of tears came.
After pulling herself together, she spoke with great difficulty about a miscarriage known only to her mother and her. Mother advised her at the time to pull herself together, not tell anyone, and look to the future: ‘You can have other babies.’ Neither of them ever referred to the miscarriage again.
The patient added, through tears, ‘I did have other babies, but they weren’t that baby I wanted and loved and lost.’
For half a century that lady bore her grief alone. Her only advisor, whom she trusted, meaning well, assured her she was handling it the right way.
If you have some old bitterness, or grief, or guilt that has festered in your soul, please love yourself enough to seek out a social worker or a minister or some other professional or friend who can be trusted to accept you as you are, gently hear you out, help you separate the wheat from the chaff, and understand.
Honest confession is good for the soul. It can improve the health of your body. It might even spare others from being victims of your impacted hurt.